Monday, October 12, 2009

My Medulla Oblongata

I find myself constantly hoping, wishing and praying that one day, someone will overlook the fact that I have no experience in anything worthwhile and give me the job of my dreams. However, as of yet, that hasn't happened.

Is it the economy? Is it my lack of drive? I'm not really sure why I have yet to find employment. There are many factors, such as the two I just listed, and also one big, fat looming fact: I don't know what to do. Indecisiveness. Yes, that is truly my middle name (yes, I know it is TRULY Ann, but it should be Indecisiveness). I have the hardest time making up my mind about certain things. I often wonder how people can take the easy route and not examine every angle for all it's worth. At times, I envy those people. They make a decision (right or not) and take action. I, on the other hand, debate and over think everything. Sure, it's great when you have a big decision you have to make--until you actually do have to make the decision. That's where I panic. Generally, I jump off the proverbial boat, as one might say. I grab my lifejacket and go.

Alas, I'm reaching the ripe old age (HAH) of 22, and now is past the time that certain life decisions should have been made. Now, I must face them.

I THINK I want to be a teacher. I would love to say that I know that is my calling and it is what I want to do, but unfortunately, I'm just not sure. I'm attempting to get into graduate school right now, and I can't help thinking that I'm using the additional schooling as a way to hide out for a few more years. I honestly hope not, because that's a pretty expensive hideout.

I just finished an application for a job I don't think I am qualified for. One good thing is that I am at least excited to do it. Unfortunately, it's also I job that I have a feeling has quite a few candidates.

2009, you are a tough cookie.

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