To Be Honest With You, I'm Honest With Me

I don't know what I want out of life. And, well, that is the one thing I've known for a while. I can't even think of a time when I truly really felt like I had a handle on what I wanted and liked and really cared about. I think basically my whole life, I have relied on others to guide me and tell me what is what. I am tired of it. I really am.

I'm 23 years old, and enough is enough. I need to gain mental, emotional, and social independence. Social independence may or may not be an oxymoron. I couldn't really say. But either way, I must retire these old ways, before I go absolutely crazy.

Not to boast, but I am generally well-liked. I mean, I have enemies and people who don't care for me, but I get along with most people. I attribute this mostly to the fact that I have an uncanny ability to scout out the similarities I have with basically anyone. Even the weirdest weirdo has SOMETHING in common with me. I've always prided myself on this skill, but as of late, I am starting to see it as a downfall. By matching everyone else, I've lost sight of myself. I am mixed up and confused as to who I really am. I want to be me and no one else, but I feel like, without anyone else...I AM no one.

I guess the first step is simply to make a gallant effort to stand up for what I believe in. I cannot cower and hide my true feelings anymore. I am entitled to my own opinion, whether it is popular or not. I cannot fear rejection. I just can't do it. I MUST BE ME!!!